Parody Of A Farce

I could take up some of your precious time pointing out the endless innuendo, contradictions and hysterics in Dovid Teitelbaum’s latest screed. However I do not have the time for that now. Something much more important, a matter of life and death has come to my attention which I need to talk about NOW!

The Camp Scam: How tens of thousands of young boys and girls have been conned out of their precious money by a scam “rabbi”

“A fool says what everyone else thinks. An idiot thinks what everyone else says” – Der velt

“Someone’s got to say what everyone else on the internet is saying” – Really courageous guy

This post is a follow-up to my previous posts:

10,000 questions about the “camp”

How I really love the camp with all my heart and soul

My position of NEVER accusing without providing detailed evidence for all to see

36 reasons why camps suck

The original purpose of this blog was to offer nice Divrei Torah for you to tell your kids by the Shabbos table. You know how “Hashem is here, Hashem is there, Hashem is truly everywhere”. That type of stuff. However I have come to most reluctant realization that there is no way I can speak about Hashem without condemning all the conniving charlatans who are behind this dreadful “camp scam”. What one has to do with the other? Freg nisht. I just cannot let this slide anymore.

My personal Rebbe, the great gaon and tzaddik, has commanded me to bring this matter to the attention of the world. He told me to give over in his name that this is the worst thing to happen to Klal Yisroel, since, I don’t know, the Golden Calf. However, I will not be posting his name for privacy reasons, I will only post the names of scoundrels. Unless someone legitimately tries to dispute any of my allegations, I will keep all my evidence private. Yes, you read this right. Unless someone tries to legitimately dispute the evidence I will show no one, I will assume that my evidence is accurate – and show no one. Stop laughing at me.

It’s truly a depressing story, but the upside is that all the thousand rabbonim that have visited this camp either a) didn’t visit b) didn’t have a clue about this camp that they so vehemently promoted. Either way, you can feel good about our clueless rabbonim.

I would’ve been happy to sell this expose to any takers, however they said no, mentioning some narishkeit about hearsay and sources (don’t exactly know what they wanted). So I’ll have to publish it myself. I really can also put up ads on my site to make me rich, but I’ll stay poor so that no one can accuse me of being being bought off by the camp directors to post this expose of them. Again you’re laughing, stop it.

You should also know that I am the ONLY one who has reams and reams of the frightful evidence. I thought about doing this post anonymously, but then it wouldn’t have the credibility I’ve earned with my previous unsourced attacks and would also cause a greater chillul hashem then I’m about to do. Are those tears in your eyes?

If I sound obsessed or something, it’s because I’m frustrated, frustrated that I’m screaming and screaming and no one is giving me the time of day. I get tens of thousands of phone calls from rabbonim, rebbes and roshei yeshiva, menhalim, mechanchim, accountants, lawyers, doctors and janitors all aghast at the camp they have been pushing. No, I won’t tell you their names, not even one. The camp mafia will kill them and their families (unlike me, who for some reason they haven”t ordered a hit on. Yes, it’s sort of depressing, what am I chopped liver??).  I cannot believe how Klal Yisroel is turning to ME to take care of it’s problems (actually, it’s kinda cool ;)). This camp situation is THE problem in Yiddishkiet today, not Torah and stuff like that. Our HOLY COMMUNITY is being debased by these camp guys, as you can see by the comments on my blog. Nasty blog comments prove that the situation is nasty which caused the nasty comments in the first place.

Do you think I enjoy all this attention? Of course not!! My first post was actually about chinuch and mentschlichkiet but since it has been over a month (do you believe it, a month! What tales so long to create perfect human beings??) and my orders recommendations have not been carried out to the letter, due to the interference of the super villains, therefore I will now attack and destroy them all. (Yes, I can do that, even though they’re super villains, their mafia cannot close ME down. Still not sure why they’re ignoring me though)

A caveat: In exposing this terrible scam, In addition to not providing any of the evidence I have, I will also not tell you who I am referring to (hint: check my previous posts). You can ask the victims of this con and they’ll tell you, although I’m not sure who the conners were and who the conees are but there were conners and conees and I will expose the truth. You look confused. Is it anything I said?

Really, I had no intention of being involved with this, when I first hocked a cheinek I had no idea what I was talking about. However that led to all the super-secret evidence coming my way, bit by bit, making be the new Bob Woodward ( I get shivers just thinking about it. Isn’t this spy stuff cool?). Some of my information I got from reliable sites such as The Onion and, others were from anonymous emails (they seemed to come from Nigeria, anybody have an idea how the Nigerians know about this?). Some facts I put together from my blog stats (I don’t know what that means, just sounds important) and other facts I got through leaked information. (The plumbers, remember? Watergate?) Many people helped me along the way but their names are not important. All you have to do is trust me. Again with the laughing.

As soon as I saw the brochure for this “camp” I KNEW something was horribly wrong.

1 Too good to be true. A camp that offers a “great time” and a “wonderful summer”? Can’t be. Whoever had a wonderful summer? Haven”t they heard of rainy days? The first sign of scandal.

2 They promise color war. Everyone knows that color war is just another way to suck in gullible campers. Then they promise a color war breakout for the ages, another lure to bait the fish (as I point out, camps in the 1920’s never had people jumping out of helicopters to announce color wars, suspicious indeed).

3 Details withheld: Just “you’ll have a great time”. No daily calenders, no minute by minute program, it MUST be a scam!

4 The booklet of stories and testimonials of campers describing what a good time they had. Who ever heard of using testimonials in an ad campaign??

5 Not associated with any known camp. Not aguda, not rayim, not shalvah. even though all the rabbonim of those camps promote this camp, but it has IT’S OWN NAME! How suspicious is that!

6 The director of the camp’s name (I said before I won’t name names, but I’ll link to a post where I do. Also in case you missed it, his name IS the link) is left off the brochure so people shouldn’t be put off by the lashon hora and rumors flying around his name (mostly started by me, but who’s checking?).

7 No verifiable references or testimonials. I mean it did say hundreds of specific names (unlike me who keeps my sources to myself) on posters all over the world, but how do you know that all the names aren’t forged? It’s not like you can call them or whatnot. You can call them and they would’ve protested if their names were forged? Surely they wouldn’t visit the camp if their names were forged? You’re forgetting it’s a mafia, a mafia I tell you (although they won’t get me, ha ha)! Sort of like that international Jewish conspiracy I read in some book, I forget it’s name protocols of the zaides or something.

8 Using photos unrelated to the topic: what does a photo of a happy boy have to do with you ponying up cash for a camp? Very suspicious.

So now let me tell you what’s REALLY going on. This camp is not really a camp, it’s a money making scam, cooked up by the director of this camp as well as the handyman who lives there all year. Basically they just want to take money money money from campers and their families. Now they do provide a camp so that’s not where the scam is. The scam is in the TRIP MONEY (shhh). Yes, the trip money is a surcharge they charged every naive camper for trips they had NO intention of going on. Even though they ended up not charging the trip fee and going on the trip regardless, that was only because something or the other happened, don’t ask me what.

Having realized that they botched up, the director and the handyman are not giving up. They intend on getting all campers to pay for the trips that they took last year by hook or by crook. To achieve that goal they put out a booklet, (which was printed before they cancelled the fee, but they knew they would have to cancel it) which pushes, pulls threatens and makes you quake in your boots (real scary pictures) if you don’t pay the fee. It does mention in big letters that the fee is optional, but not in REALLY BIG letters, just normal big ones. Thieves.

You may be tempted to explain the above as just a camp trying to arrange a nice trip for it’s campers, but don’t be fooled. It is a horrible, terrible, no good, money grubbing scam. If anyone has a different explanation, feel free to share it with me, but don’t use names, especially the name and organization that I used. This is not about people, but about a poor, perhaps well-intentioned but misguided camp. Who are evil, horrible, mean, nasty and call me names.

And don’t try to pin this all on this director or the above mentioned organization (even though that’s what I did). All the rabbonim who support this camp (even though they are naive, were duped and their signature forged and I have the greatest respect for them) should have their feet held to the fire. And all those who don’t want to read this article, sign them up anyway, what a surprise it will be for them. Wait, are you calling ME childish!

In summation: I do believe that all the rabbonim who promote this camp are sincere about it, although they have known exactly what type of scam they are getting into. I don’t know how this makes sense, ask them. Despite how this is not about me at all, you should just know what bad stuff I’ve gone through ever since I began calling people names in public and making baseless charges. Sheesh, are these guys sensitive! Call them thieves or whatever and they really get mean! Now they’re calling ME names, how DARE they!! Anyway this is the my last post on this subject after by previous two final posts and until my next final post. So long. And remember people, ALWAYS RESPECT RABBONIM!


27 thoughts on “Parody Of A Farce

  1. Yeah, you sound bitter.
    His basic point, that Yiddishkeit is being presented as something that you can only be good at if you forbid more and more and more is sound. That approach is causing many Jews to become disillusioned with the whole package and instead of feeling sympathy for them they are told “well you were never really frum in the first place, were you?”

  2. The important difference is that camps don’t beg the questions that the Asifa did. It’s obvious how camps work and what they do, and dozens of your acquaintances worked in them and can attest to that. Not so the Asifa, which came out of nowhere, evolved ten times from the original conception, and after many people questioned its purpose, was confirmed in fact to have no purpose. R’ Teitelbaum’s answers may be cynical, but he’s addressing questions that the Asifa itself did not answer.
    Why now does there suddenly need to be an asifa?
    What changed from the twice yearly gatherings in local venues to hear the Jeremiads of the local rabbonim?
    Why did the event that was marketed as a way to deal with modern technology offer no such guidance?
    Why did some “gedolim” (does that word mean anything anymore?) discourage people from attending, and when that happened, how did the undoubtedly righteous organizers still claim that it was achdus across the entire community? I understand that Lubavitch are idol worshippers and Modern Orthodox heathens, but R’ Meir Stern and R’ Shmuel Kaminetsky are part of the frum community and didn’t bother supporting the Asifa.
    Not only are R’ Teitelbaum’s descriptions compelling, if a little over the top, the Asifa also undermines my emunah. I am frum because I couldn’t imagine how 600,000 people could claim that they stood around a mountain and received the Torah f it wasn’t true. Yet, 60,000 people stood and watched this event, and now all the frum media is telling the story entirely differently than the way it happened.

    • His article is blathering gibberish. If his logic is compelling then maybe we really didn’t land on the moon.

      As for the Asifa, it has accomplished a lot, whether you deign to acknowledge it or not. Your comparison to Matan torah makes no sense to me at all. Please provide an example of people misrepresenting what occurred there. The solutions were clear. Internet for business only with a filter.

      I realize you don’t LIKE the solution, but it was offered and understood by the vast majority of attendees. I know, you and ALL your friends didn’t so therefore nobody did. Sure.

      • I didn’t say that his logic was compelling, I said his version of events was, because it answers a lot of the questions. You refuse to acknowledge that there are any questions, because once a gadol, any gadol, is involved, everything that happens is per se wonderful. That is also why the some of the attendees “understood” the “solution”. I remember when a recently deceased R’Y was nearing the end of his life. His mental acuity was not what it had been, and he spoke several times in public and said things that didn’t make sense. Despite the reality being obvious, his talmidim insisted that if you knew what he was saying, it made sense.
        Sure, the Asifa can help some people in some situations. In that sense, it even accomplished “a lot”, arguably, since there were so many people there and it got so much publicity. In that sense, you could accomplish “a lot” in any area, from lashon hara to hilchos tzitzis. But the context still made no sense. People who knew the slightest thing about the internet already had K-9 in place. People who didn’t need the internet, by and large, already didn’t have it. (I myself, for example, although I wear a blue shirt and a black heart, only got internet recently when I started taking college courses.)
        So in order to do something that didn’t seem particularly important to anyone except purportedly a few select gedolim, millions of dollars of “tzedaka” were spent and close to a million hours of Torah were not learned. As a result, many people now know once again that internet should not be in the home, and that internet at work should be filtered. Notwithstanding some stories in the heimishe papers, I suspect that most businesses already filtered the internet, because it is the type of necessity that businesses understood before Rabbi Wachsman.

        • You have no idea how much this asifa has energized thousands and thousands of people to get filters and shut browsers on phones etc. You can put up nice svaros all day, but they are contradicted by facts on the ground.

          And you have no clue what you’re talking about. The internet problem is one of THE problems facing most rabonnim in the Haredi tzibbur. Stop projecting your wishful thinking on Haredim.

          • Other than ad hominem, you have not responded to anything that I wrote. FWIW, I am part of the Charedi community, so I do know what the reaction is like. There are people who react positively but can’t explain why it was necessary to have an asifa. Most people in Lakewood that I have spoken to are baffled by the whole thing. Many charedim I know are mocking the way the whole thing went off, including the way it ended up being all in yiddish, the way that it was portrayed as being supported by all rabbonim when everyone knew that it wasn’t the case, the way it resulted in some highly entertaining politics – if you live in Lakewood, perhaps you’ve heard about them. Of course, you’ve already made up your mind that anyone who thinks such things is obviously not Charedi and not worthy of your intellectual indulgence. But I assure you that at least up until the Asifa, these people were completely Charedi in dress, practice, and socialization, up to and including having gone to the Asifa.

            I don’t deny that the internet is THE problem facing rabbonim. What I question is why they don’t choose something more problematic to be concerned about.

            • Politics? There were lots of politics leading up to the Asifa. Which is to be expected when dealing with a diverse range of opinions. So what?

              Anecdotal evidence doesn’t impress me, it goes both ways. Most people I’VE spoken to think it was great. Moreover, Lakewood did have two mini-asifa’s recently in which they promoted the same guidelines that are in place elsewhere.

              It was portrayed as being supported by rov minyan ubinyan of Haredi rabbonim, which it was. You dispute that?

              I’ve made it clear that people are entitled to and may think whatever they want, the question is how do they ACT. In accordance with rabbonim or not.

              I don’t understand your last statement. If you understand the churban the internet has wrought then why should’t it be concerning to all?

              • I dispute that the internet has caused a churban. The internet is like all modern technology. It raises new possibilities, and some of those possibilities are negative. I don’t believe that many people have been severely hurt by the internet, and among those who have, overreaction to the internet is just as likely to have been a cause as the actual internet.

                • The experts in the field, the ones who get the results of this churban, disagree with you, vehemently. Give Rabbi Veiner from Monsey a call and hear what he has to say.

                  How can overreaction cause damage? that makes no sense.

                  Is it possible that you are blinded by your own desires to enjoy the internet, therefore leading you to you above conclusions?

  3. The experts in the field, the ones who get the results of this churban, disagree with you, vehemently. Give Rabbi Veiner from Monsey a call and hear what he has to say.

    How can overreaction cause damage? that makes no sense.

    Is it possible that you are blinded by your own desires to enjoy the internet, therefore leading you to you above conclusions?

    People who get the “results” of the internet are not the experts in the field. If anything, they are uniquely unqualified because all they do all day is listen to people’s sob stories, so their opinions are skewed. This is especially true of the rabbonim who set themselves up as “experts” in dealing with a particular crisis – they get all the phone calls from all the surrounding areas, until they think that the entire world is doing nothing but watching porn all day. No one ever knocks on a Rabbi’s door to say he or she is doing fine. The rest of us, on the other hand, see not only the extremes, but the vast majority of people who manage to still go about our days despite the “churban.”

    I don’t know why your knee jerk reaction is that it’s impossible for overreaction to cause damage. Do you dispute the possibility of overreaction generally, or just with regard to the internet? An example of overreaction would be if a man came home and found that his wife had been watching porn, and on that basis decided to get divorced – you’d have a great example of a family falling victim to the internet, except that it would actually be a family falling victim to stupidity. Another example might be if someone became severely depressed because he/she looked at porn.

    As usual, your post ends with an “argument” that is both conclusory and ad hominem. I would counter by suggesting that perhaps you are blinded by your inability to comprehend the possibility that one could sit at a computer and not immediately and involuntarily search for inappropriate things.

    • I’m sorry but your logic is flawed. Who are the experts in any field? Are they not the ones who deal with the problems? Aren’t doctors the experts on what’s going on health-wise in the community? Should we better trust those who get none of the negative repercussions to make decisions based on what they see (or don’t see)?

      The experts know full well that they get the bad cases. It is not at all hard to determine if the percentage is problematic, even without people coming over to day “they use the internet and it’s okay”. If a problem reaches a critical mass it needs to be dealt with.

      I was referring to internet overreaction specifically. It’s laughable that arguing for internet restriction causes more internet damage. I’m sure banning sugar drinks (large sizes) makes people go out and buy more of it, right?

      My point was simple. If you avail yourself of the internet for enjoyment and recreation then you are biased in favor of keeping it for personal reasons. it is therefore reasonable to assume that your opposition to the asifa and its goals is no more then a rationalization of your behavior. Lo ovdu yisroel avoda zarah ela lehater lahem arayos.

      • There are certain things that one can tell by looking at changes within ones practice. So a Rav, or a doctor might say, last year all the people that came to me complained about XYZ, but now it’s ABC. Outside of that, a doctor is no more qualified than anyone else to say how many people are sick, unless there is some reasonable way to quantify it. And of course, unlike the rabbinate, the medical field seeks actual data before announcing new initiatives.

        And yes, it is hard to determine whether the response to a problem is proportionate without knowing anything about the nature of what they’re dealing with.

        Did you see the examples of internet overreaction that I gave? Because you didn’t respond to them.

        And of course it is simple to say that people who use the internet do so because they want to use the internet. As it happens, I am generally against the communal and rabbinic railing that goes on because it mostly fits into the “opening your mouth and removing all doubt” category. I was against it regarding the internet before I had the internet, I was against it regarding tznius even though my family (wife and sisters, etc.) is not a bunch of fashion plates.

        And if you don’t have the internet, and you don’t understand the utility or necessity of it, doesn’t it stand to reason that you are not qualified to determine what the standards of use for it are? By the same token, if the only people you know are exactly like you, is it reasonable for you to make judgments about what people unlike you should be doing?

  4. I enjoyed, really enjoyed, your post.

    However, your responses are flawed, since the information you give is incorrect.

    There may have been positive outcomes from the Asifa, I do concede that.

    However, to say that the goals weren’t changed, or that there was no misrepresentation is truly, really, ignoring what was right in front of you.

    The first ads had an expo advertised on them. The expo was cancelled after a few weeks. Was that not a change/misrepresentation?

    “an unprecedented gathering of education and chizuk” was how it was touted. Was there even one SHRED of education?

    “You can’t live with it, you can’t live without it” the first ads touted, then the asifa became all about “Do live without it” Is that not a misrepresentation?

    “With the Ichud’s team of experts and invaluable educational resources, Rabbanim and mechanchim in communities far and wide have familiarized themselves with the nuances of technological advancement and are helping families deal with these gadgets in the Torah way.”
    This is another misrepresentation. there are NOT helping families deal with the gadgets, they instructed not to HAVE the gadgets.

    “Under the guidance of the Ichud, kehillos and schools have set up committees and devised tailor-made guidelines to help ”
    That is another misrepresentation. there was no “tailor made guidelines” there was ONE guidline they announced they were imposing on EVERYBODY

    One of the falacies is that if you were against what the Asifa was, you were “against the Gedolim”
    However, the Asifa changed… AFTER “The Gedolim” signed on.
    Does that mean the organizers were “Against the Gedolim”?

    “The Gedolim” signed onto an Asifa that WAS supposed to have men AND women attend,
    “The Gedolim” signed onto an Asifa that WAS going to have an expo.
    “The Gedolim” signed onto an Asifa that was to educate about technology
    “The Gedolim” signed onto an Asifa that was NOT about banning the internet.

    Instead, there were NO women alowed, NO expo, NO education, and WAS about banning the internet….
    In other words, the Asifa turned out to be everything “the Gedolim” did NOT sign on to.

  5. Excellent comment. I would add that that Eytan Kobre, the self-proclaimed spokesman for the Asifa, made statements that were clearly inconsistent with the statements made by the speakers at the actual event. Kobre was reported as saying that the purpose of the Asifa was not to ban the internet, but to educate how to use it properly. That’s not what happened.

    After the event, Kobre said the following, seemingly to temper this inconsistency between the organizers’ wishes for the even and the rabbinic speakers:

    The motto of the event, which was approved by the top rabbinic leadership, was, “Using technology in accordance with Jewish values.” But there’s no question that some of the speeches conveyed a more absolutist view — recommendations not to have Internet at all in the home, or only to the extent absolutely necessary for business. Our community is often viewed as a monolith, but we’re a diverse group of 300,000 to 500,000. (

    However, Harediandproud, along with many others, don’t even admit that the Asifa organizers admit that not every charedi godol holds the same view. According to these folks, every who can claim to be a godol feels exactly the same way (and that way happens to be exactly their own personal view).

    • I mistakenly put this as a regular comment. It is meant to be a reply to Chaim’s comment, above.

  6. my name is ari broyn and i went to sdei chemed this past year as a camper. i am in tenth grade and i can honestly say that this past summer was the best summer experience i have had in my life.i did enjoy it and was inspired strongly. if you visit the website- you will see that there is a daily calender online and before camp they send a personal email to each camper with a minute by minute calendar of the entire summer. also it is one of the only all boys, modern orthodox touring camps in Israel. we do not get involved with any girls there making it not possible to get involved with ncsy programs and we do have basketball games against camp emes which is also a touring camp in israel.the camp directors name is also listed on the website - so what you were saying about rumors is also false. if u look on the website you will see thousands of pictures and videos of campers having a blast in many different places all over Israel. one more thing. the entire point of sending a kid to a camp for the summer is for him to have fun.thats why they have sports and activities- so they enjoy. the fact that you see all of their campers happy shows that sdei chemed does exactly that.

  7. “Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo.” – HG Wells

    WOW. I have no idea who you are, or what planet you are living on. Did you go to this camp?
    Well I did.

    First of all: You sound miserable.Camp is all about a good time! The summer is all about being WONDERFUL! And if it rains, we have fun in the rain! That’s why every kid looks forward to going to the summer, to camp. Because that’s where they can just have a good time and be themselves.
    Have you ever gone to camp? If you’ve gone to camp and had a horrible time, then I can get why you are jealous of all the kids having the time of their lives at this camp. If you had a horrible time at camp, I would blame it on your miserable, bitter, negative attitude. You are scamming yourself.

    You call the directors of this camp thieves. And your reasons are:
    – “Using photos unrelated to the topic” : Please explain how using pictures of kids IN CAMP is unrelated to the CAMP’s brochure?!! When I decide to go to a camp of course I want to see pictures!! What else should there be pictures of?
    – “No verifiable references or testimonials.” : I wrote a testimonial. Why should my testimonial be verifiable?! You say: “but how do you know that all the names aren’t forged? It’s not like you can call them or whatnot” Do you really expect kids to have their information on the ad, so that creeps like YOU can call them up?
    And people have called me to ask about the camp and I say the truth. I had the most amazing summer of my life.
    – “Not associated with any known camp.” : It is its own known camp!! Is Aguda not allowed to have its own name? Does Rayim have to be associated with Aguda? And maybe the rabbonim promote this camp because its a GOOD CAMP!
    -There is an hourly schedule for this camp.

    I can really go on and on. You blog is baseless.

    But I also want to add,
    You say they’re all in it for the money, and they don’t care about the fun.
    The amount my parents paid for this camp is the same as the other camps i went to here in new york. I got so much more for my money out of this camp! Every day is packed with trips THAT WE GO ON. And the people are so warm and friendly.

    Some advice for you:
    Wake up, relax, breathe, and smile. That feeling is called Living!
    Live life. Not STUPIDITY.

    • Ari and shaindee,

      Did you read the title of this post?

      You might want to do a search on the word “parody”

        • go visit the website, look at the camps photo wall and dont even pretend to say that every single camper in every picture looks like they are having a blast, which is exactly what camps are supposed to do. i just have one question for you- where did you get this information from- that the camp is a fraud?

  8. Pingback: The Asifa: An Overwhelming Success | Haredi And Proud

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